he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize