okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
