P.S. I can't hear my feet
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
I just want nice things and good sex
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Randomize
