You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
You ruined the universe
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
