I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
