Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
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