ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
She's like a pop up book from hell.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize