I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Randomize
