And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
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