I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Randomize
