her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
