Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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