Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
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