"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
