girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
How's work?
Spinning.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
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