He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
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