OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
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