its not stalking. its research.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Randomize
