The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
