OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
i believe in u and ur pee
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Randomize
