I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
