In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Randomize
