wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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