Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
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