I bet he comes in French.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
Randomize