she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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