Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
