No, you can still breathe under the balls.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
