I hope mine doesn't look like that
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
