About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
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