I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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