their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
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