I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
