I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize
