Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
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