My underwear smells like fireworks.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Randomize
