wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
