Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Life without a bra equals bliss.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
