Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
Girls should come with a carfax report
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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