I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
