so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
Randomize
