You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
