the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
Vodka?
Forever.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
