Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
