How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Randomize
