Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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