i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Randomize
