dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize
