Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
someone owes me an orgasm
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
Randomize
