I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Randomize
